The Raisin Bran Incident
by Laura Elizabeth
Summary: "Jessica, am I turning you on because I'm eating healthy cereal?" he murmured into the skin of her throat, eliciting a small moan from her. The vibration tickled his lips and he kissed her again. This story is based loosely off one of the sides for season three, but in no way reveals spoilers!


**Disclaimer:** Not mine.

**A/N:** I've been avoiding spoilers, but I did manage to read a few of the sides released for the first few episodes. This story is based around one of them, and is basically my interpretation of what *could* have happened. It's not speculation, just a bit of imaginative fun. It's light smut, kind of like…light mayo (that's a joke for my NG Skype friends.)

Please take the time to let me know what you think if you can, I'd appreciate it! Enjoy! Also, enjoy the premiere!

A persistent buzzing sound broke the silence of the darkened bedroom, rousing Jess from a rather _nice _dream. She reached for her phone, but something stopped her. Nick's arm was slung heavily over her waist, and his dead weight was only pressing her further into the mattress. Instead of trying to extract herself from his hold, she leaned as far as she could, scooting the phone closer to her with her fingertips. It continued to buzz, but thankfully she answered just before it could go to voicemail.

"Hello?" She whispered, hoping whoever was on the other end could hear her.

"Jess? It's Peg. Listen, boss man told me to give you a call. He's got a lot on his plate today, but he wanted to squeeze in a little one-on-one with you first thing this morning."

"A meeting? What about?"

"Well, between you and me, I'd be willing to bet my fantastic sex life that it's about hiring you on a more permanent basis."

She breathed out quickly, bangs fluttering from her eyes before settling back into place. "That would be- that would be wonderful. What time should I be there?"

"Eight-fifteen."

She looked down at her phone and frowned. "Yeah, ok. I can do that. Thanks for calling Peg, I really appreciate it."

She ended the call and allowed the dim glow of her phone to guide her as she carefully rolled out from under Nick's arm. He groaned a little at the action, pulling the pillow she had been sleeping on to his body, but thankfully, remained asleep. She tried to find her clothes, but couldn't. Last night had been… well, it'd been a little wild. She smiled at the memory as she toed his boxer shorts out of her way. Short on time, she decided to slide the t-shirt on that he had been wearing yesterday. Quietly, she cracked open his bedroom door and poked her head out into the hall before making a mad dash for her bedroom.

It was already 7:30, and with the morning traffic she would probably be late. She groaned at the inconvenience of it all and took a brush to her terrible (awesome, sex-rumpled) bed-head. She hoped the meeting wouldn't last long. Going home and climbing back into bed sounded wonderful. The "congratulations on the job" sex didn't sound so bad either. With this pleasant thought at the back of her mind, she quickly pulled her hair into a loose bun. After applying light make-up, she dressed in a simple white blouse, navy skirt, and a pair of fun, printed flats. Professional and functional, just the way she liked it.

She scribbled a quick note for Nick and, at the risk of Schmidt or Winston finding it, slid it under his bedroom door before grabbing her purse and coat and leaving the loft.

* * *

Nick woke up with the heat of the sun on his face. He yawned and stretched, surprised at how good he had slept. Remembering the previous night's activities he smiled. So maybe he wasn't _that_ surprised. And even when they didn't do anything but cuddle, he always slept better with her next to him. He rolled to his side, expecting to see her still sleeping, but instead was only greeted with a pillow. He wondered if maybe she was making breakfast for them as she so often did, but when he strained to listen for the usual kitchen-sounds, he heard none. Not the whir of the mixer, the scrape of a spatula, and certainly not Jess's incessant humming. (He'd never admit that he loved it. And he certainly wouldn't admit that he'd recently had a dream in which Jess was humming while holding a small baby with a head full of dark hair and the biggest eyes he'd ever seen. Nope.) No, all he heard was silence and a distant car horn echoing from the street below.

Reluctantly he got out of bed, wishing that he still had the warmth of her body next to his. The last several weeks had been fast and intense, but right now all he wanted to do was relish every last second of it. His alarm clock— well calling it that was debatable because it was held together by duct tape, didn't actually have a functioning alarm, and the red numbers were barely visible anymore— read 9:07. He wished he could go back to bed for at least two more hours, but his stomach took that opportune moment to growl loudly, leading him to his bedroom door. Before he opened it, he noticed a folded pink piece of paper on the floor, adorned with her neat, bulbous scrawl.

_Gone to school for a meeting, I think I got the job! Should be back soon._

_-Jess  
Ps. Keep the bed warm for me._

He grinned at the implications of the little winking face at the end of the note and padded into the kitchen. Nick considered his options: eggs (they nearly always ended up disastrous,) pancakes (though Schmidt would surely kill him if he found out he'd used his electric griddle,) and cereal. Cereal was a safe food. He could make a mean bowl of cereal. He rummaged through the cabinets, putting a firm "no" to Winston's Sugar Puffs and Schmidt's organic stuff with…flax seed? What the hell was that?

He winced at the idea of going to the grocery to get his own food. He'd settle for unopened box of cereal at the back of the cupboard. It looked simple, and actually, somewhat agreeable. He tore open the box, grabbed a bowl, spoon, and milk, and sat down at the kitchen table.

* * *

That's how Jess found him not even ten minutes later. After closing the door behind her she made her way over to him looking apologetic.

"Hey, sorry I dashed this morning. Peg called and-" She stopped in her tracks when she saw what he was eating. "Is that- are you- are you eating Raisin Bran?"

He looked up innocently, mouth full of cereal, and smiled. A small stream of milk dribbled down his chin and Jess had to lean against the table for support.

"Yeah Jess, this stuff is amazing! Who knew a healthy cereal would have raisins covered in sugar!"

In lieu of a moan, she managed a strangled "Uh huh." Apparently, words had become difficult.

"And it makes the milk sweet! Ya know, I never would've thought I'd like it, but I do!" He grinned like a little boy.

Jess braced herself against the table and met his eyes. "Mhm. Yeah. Great."

He studied her for a second, eyebrows quirked, before a knowing smile slowly stretched across his face. "Are you ok Jess? You look a little flushed."

That seemed to work. She pushed herself away from the table and smoothed down her clothes while clearing her throat. "Uh yeah, I'm fine Nick, no need to worry about me. I am a-ok!"

"Really? Are you sure Jess? You look a little warm."

"What? Psssshhhh, noooo. I'm as cool as a cucumber." _Oh this is great Jess, you sound ridiculous. _

Nick, showing nonchalance, shrugged his shoulders and brought the spoon to his mouth, intentionally raising his eyes to meet hers at the exact same moment. She looked away quickly and moved to the kitchen, muttering about making herself a cup of tea.

She heard the scrape of his chair against the floor and then suddenly he was behind her at the sink. He wrapped his arms around her and without actually touching her, placed his bowl in the sink. He could feel her suck in a deep breath, chest expanding, back touching his for the briefest moment as she tried to focus on filling her tea kettle. He leaned down slowly and kissed the back of her neck. She turned the water off and abandoned her kettle in the sink, leaning back into Nick's chest. She closed her eyes as his arms tightened around her, his hands slowly coaxing her blouse out from where she had tucked it into her skirt.

"Jessica, am I turning you on because I'm eating healthy cereal?" he murmured into the skin of her throat, eliciting a small moan from her. The vibration tickled his lips and he kissed her again.

"Maybe," she finally croaked as his hands slipped up the front of her blouse and began caressing the soft skin of her stomach.

"Oh, I think it is." He remembered the last time this had been brought up. They'd fought and made out and broke Schmidt's aquarium. He wasn't mad this time because everything that they are now had already been laid out on the table. He liked that. Now, he was just amused that he was figuring out the best possible way to push all of her buttons.

His breath was warm against her ear as he spoke and she shivered. "You do know that I want to be better, right?" He stopped fiddling with the buttons on her blouse and turned her around to face him, still holding her incredibly close. "Not just for me, but for you too."

"But I don't-"

"I know you don't care Jess, but I want to be healthier. And I want good things for myself. For us," he added quietly. "And if that means drinking one of Schmidt's kale shake things then I'll do it. Because I want to live a long, good life. And I want to live it with you."

She let out a whoosh of breath and reached up with one hand to cup his cheek. "Where did all of this come from?"

Hyper aware of the seriousness occurring between them and with no room for backpedaling, he suddenly became nervous and shifted his gaze from her. She dropped her hand from his face as he spoke. "Well, I was just thinking. You know, thoughts and stuff, and well." He trailed off, unable to vocalize what he actually wanted to say. "I just don't talk about feelings much, and I have a lot of feelings about things and- and you and I thought you should know."

She smiled softly and grabbed his chin, redirecting his gaze to her own. "I know Nick; you don't have to say any more." She pulled him down to her, lips seizing his in a heated kiss. She leaned into the sink, the edge of the counter digging into the middle of her back, as his hands resumed their earlier exploration under her shirt. He kissed his way across her jawline and all the way down her neck, nipping at the sensitive skin just above her collar bone.

And then she was chuckling, placing both hands against his chest and pushing him back slightly. He continued kissing her, hands trailing across her ribs. "Hey, were you serious about the kale shakes?" It came out a little breathier than she had intended.

He lifted his head then, genuinely baffled by her question. "That's the stuff in sushi, right?" She laughed again and kissed him, simultaneously reaching down and tugging at the waistband of his boxers.

"Uh Jess, as much as I'm enjoying this I don't think we-"

"Shut up Nick." She raked her nails over his chest and he moaned into her kiss. She pushed them both away from the counter and tried to maneuver them through the kitchen. Nick's back collided with the refrigerator. They definitely weren't going to make it to either of their bedrooms.

"Couch?"

"Too far."

With her tongue in his mouth and her hand creeping down the front of his boxers he couldn't argue with her. Instead, a crazy idea took hold of him. He guided her backwards until they were standing in front of Schmidt's room. He fumbled blindly for the doorknob as he continued to kiss and pushed it open with his foot, both of them stumbling into the room.

"Sex in Schimdt's room?" She bit down lightly on his earlobe and he gasped. "I did always wonder how comfortable his fancy bed was." She stops then, still rather entwined with Nick, to eye Schmidt's bed.

For a minute he thinks that she looks unsure, but then she's pulling him closer to the bed, a teasing smile in place. "Is it weird that I find this incredibly sexy?"

"Nah." He paused. "Hey, you think he changed the sheets?"

She giggled. "This coming from a man who uses a sleeping bag."

"Yeah, you're right. We should really buy sheets."

She didn't stop to question the implications of his use of the word "we." Instead, she gave him a rather predatory smile and kissed him fiercely, pushing him back until his knees hit the edge of the bed. They toppled backwards onto the bed together, Jess heavily splayed across his chest. The impact forced a breathy laugh from both of them. Nick wiggled underneath her, and she could feel his erection pressing against her leg.

"It's so soft, Jess. The bed is sooooo soft!"

"Nick," she rasped, "you need to stop that."

He stilled instantly, all childishness gone. "You know I was serious about what I said earlier. I mean, I just really want you to know that."

"I know Nick."

He reached up and brushed a lose hair away from her face. He stared at her a moment before a wide grin broke out on his face. "You really are gorgeous, Jess. I don't think I say that enough." She hummed appreciatively and slid her hands down his chest.

"I need you to take your clothes off, Nicholas. Right now."

"Yes ma'am!" He mock saluted and repositioned then so that they were sitting side by side on the bed. He quickly threw his shirt over his head and stood, kicking his boxers across the room, all the while she watched him hungrily. He then pulled her to her feet and started to unbutton her blouse.

But something was up. She smacked his hands away and smiled wildly at him. "I have an idea."

''What? Come on Jess," he whined and started down at his own naked body. "It's not fair that you still have all your clothes on!" He looked like a child eager to open his Christmas presents.

"I was thinking… I should make you work for it." Well this was new. She pointed to her top, already partly unbuttoned. "Kale shake."

His jaw dropped. "Oh come on Jess, I thought we were kinda joking about that."

"Nope."

"Jess." He turtle-faced.

She arched her eyebrows, a devious smile on her lips. "Come on Nick," she said huskily. "Don't you want to see me naked?"

He swallowed hard. "So, kale shake?" He pointed to her blouse dumbly and she nodded. "Ok, yeah, I think I can do that. You gonna monitor me later to make sure I actually drink it?" He winked at her and she nodded again as she slowly began unbuttoning her shirt the rest of the way. Once it was on the floor she pointed to her skirt.

"Broccoli." She watched him wrinkle his nose. "Steamed broccoli. Not the kind with cheese." She unzipped her skirt and he watched it fall gracefully from her body, pooling at her feet. She stepped out of it and moved a little closer to him. She reached behind her back to unclasp her bra. "Spinach."

"Aye aye!" he shouted, doing his best Popeye impression. She nearly broke her seductive guise then, trying her hardest not to laugh. She tossed her bra across the room and walked right up to him, kissing him soundly on the mouth. His tongue traced her lips, asking her to deepen the kiss, but she refused. Instead, she moved his hands down to her waist, where he could feel the top of her panties under his fingers. Lace.

"And these," she purred into his ear "are brussel sprouts." He nodded, completely at a loss for words. She allowed him to remove the last piece of clothing that separated them, and she savored the feeling of his warm hands sliding down her thighs.

They moved back to the bed and laid down, Nick hovering over her. She gasped as he took that moment to kiss his way down her now bare chest, stopping to take her right breast in his mouth. Her hand came around the back of his neck and she moaned at the delicious things his tongue was doing to her. He broke the contact to look back up at her, eyes dark and hazy.

"Nick." He ignored her, trailing kisses the rest of the way down her chest and stomach. His name fell from her mouth again in a low moan. He kissed her hip and she shifted underneath him, a small whimper pleading him to hurry. He laughed against her, teeth scraping at her skin as he moved his mouth to the inside of her thigh.

"Jess, don't you think that I deserve a reward for eating so healthy?" She groaned as his mouth moved against her.

"Can't argue with you there!" she yelped as his tongue danced around her most sensitive spot. She laid back against the pillows and closed her eyes, enjoying every sensation he was giving her.

He continued his actions, spurred on by the whispers of 'yes' and 'right there' and his name. Her eyes fluttered open and closed as she rocked her hips. And then she wasn't saying anything, just moaning and fisting the sheets and he knew exactly what to do to push her over the edge.

But before he could do it, she was shouting at him. "Nick! Stop right now!" He looked up at her flushed body, a little confused. "Get a condom you fool!"

"Oh!" He grinned and abandoned his place between her thighs. He opened Schmidt's nightstand and frowned. "Ugh Jess, you should see all the condoms in here. It's like a porno or something."

"Nick, stop talking." He looked back to see her writhing a little on the bed, so incredibly close to completion. This must be killing her. He ripped open packet and quickly rolled the condom down on himself before lying back on the bed. She hooked one leg over his back as he slid into her. Jess buried her face in his neck as he began moving against her. She matched his pace and soon they were both panting, moaning nonsensical words into the other's skin.

"Oh my god Jess." He groaned as she bit into his shoulder, so close to climaxing. She could feel her stomach muscles tightening, her vision going out of focus. And with one final thrust she came undone beneath him, crying out his name and pulsating around him. He followed her over the edge, lowering his weight on top of her, chest to chest, as they relaxed into their shared ecstasy. He rolled off of her and they laid side by side in silence, both too caught up in the moment to speak. Jess rolled onto her side to look at him, propping herself up at the elbow. He reached toward her and touched her face.

"That was…"

"Amazing," she finished for him, smiling wide.

"I was going to say different, but amazing works too." She swatted him on the arm with a laugh. "Well it was. Oh man, Schmidt would kill us if he knew!"

She scrunched up her face. "That's-just no, Nick. No. No one will know about this."

"Top secret, eh? You know, you may just have to work for it."

"Oh really? And what would you have me do?"

"Well, I was thinking-"

But he didn't get to finish his sentence because the front door opened. They both froze. There wasn't any time to move back to either of their rooms. They were caught.

Frantically, they both tried to get out bed. Nick jumped around the room, trying to find where he threw his boxes. Jess however, had gotten tangled in the bed sheets and fell to the floor with a loud crash. She yelped as her knee collided with the bed frame. "Damn it. Nick. Help me!"

Abandoning his quest to find his boxers, he ran over to Jess, trying to separate her from Schmidt's sheets. Neither of them heard the door open, but they certainly heard the shouting coming from behind them.

"WHAT IN MOSES'S NAME DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

Slowly, they both turned to face him. Schmidt was standing in the doorway, a look of disgust on his face. "I came home to get my caiman attaché, and here are you two-" he gestured wildly at their obvious nakedness "lovebirds going at it in _my _boudoir!"

Nick was too traumatized to speak.

"Schmidt, I'm so sorry, it wasn't supposed to happen, but we got so caught up in the moment and we just-"

"I can see that." He put his hands on his hips to emphasize his anger. "This is not ok, I'll have you know. In no way is this ok. And oh ho, Nick," he wagged his index finger in Nick's direction "you owe me a new set of sheets. Those were Egyptian Cotton!"

"Schmidty, I'm sorry man."

"Don't you 'Schmidty' me! This is my passion palace, Nicholas! It is far too sophisticated for your primal, cave man urges! Club her over the head and drag her to your bedroom before you have your way with her!"

Jess's anger flared to life. "EXCUSE ME?"

Nick spoke at the same time, apparently even more angry then she was. "DON'T TALK ABOUT JESS LIKE THAT!"

Both Jess and Schmidt turned to look at Nick, different expressions marring their faces. Jess's was one of adoration, touched that he had stuck up for her. Schmidt's was of awe, completely dumbstruck that Nick had grown a pair and was finally showing Jess how much he cared about her.

Schmidt threw his hands in the air out of frustration. "Fine. You know what? I'm just going to pretend this never happened. But you owe me. New sheets and an apology dinner." He puffed his chest out, clearly proud of his own compromise. "And no Douchebag Jar for a week. And if Winston says anything you both have to come to my defense. Every single time."

They both nodded, too mortified with what had just happened to argue with him.

"Ugh. Animals." He stalked through room, picked up his attaché case, and stormed back out.

"Spray some of my lavender breeze before you leave!"

They heard the front door close and Jess let out a nervous chuckle. "Ok, so we're never doing that again."

He grimaced. "Definitely not. Though I gotta admit, it was nice."

Her eyebrows shot up. "You said it was amazing earlier."

He laughed as he stepped into his boxers. "It was damn good Jess. You're damn good."

She grinned and continued to get dressed. Together they stripped the sheets from Schmidt's bed and threw them out into the hall.

"Come on Nick, we should go get Schmidt new sheets before he gets home and has a meltdown."

He smiled. "We could get some too, if you want. And a real blanket."

"Of course. Yeah, that sounds good." Sometimes he really believed her smile could light the darkest places in his life. "And while we're at it, we should get stuff for Schmidt's apology dinner. Maybe pasta?"

"Oh, pasta sounds really good."

"Yeah?" Uh-oh. There it was again. That devious smile.

"Yeah." He drew out the word, looking at her a little confused (and scared, though he'd never admit it.)

"That's too bad Miller. Because I remember a certain someone expressing his desire to try a kale shake for dinner."


End file.
